About that time

Posted on Wed Oct 28th, 2020 @ 6:48pm by Lieutenant Commander James Trallos MD

Mission: Survival of the fittest
Location: Councilor's office

James looked around his quarters. It was still early morning, before Alpha shift would start. He had been drinking coffee for the last couple of hours letting the time tick by. He tried to busy himself with hobbies, watch a holo, or read a book, but had given up after a couple hours of effort. He just sat, thinking how this would go. He looked at the time and saw it was close enough. With a sigh, he got into the shower and began his normal morning routine.

He finished ensuring his uniform was straight and made his was to medical. As he suspected, everything was clean, quiet and no patients. If anyone had been hurt, they would get beamed straight to the station. He walked into his office, put on his lab coat and the left medical and walked to the starboard side of the deck to the new Counselor's office. He looked around and pressed the door chime.

Jane had been wrapping little bundles of various cookies in colorful cheerful plastic bags and tieing them with twirly ribbons and bows. She was preparing for an event to introduce herself to some of the various crew. So busy she'd been that time had slipped away. She was reminded of it now by the musical sounds of the door chime. She looked up to the door then the water clock. She looked down at the coffee table a mess of craft gear upon it. Then gingerly got up and went to the door.

"Oh hello doctor welcome. Please come in. I was hoping you could make it. I understand your time is precious so I will try not to keep you longer then you need to be." He was tall, well taller then she was which most people were. He had a handsomely groomed beared over a very pleasant face with kind if not nervous eyes. She liked him instantly. He was a man who healed the body when it broke and she was a woman who healed the spirit and the mind. She stepped aside beckoning him to enter.

James walked in and smiled at her. He could see she was busy preparing something with much more craftiness than he could manage without a replicator. "Good morning Counselor, am I interrupting something?" He asked glancing around. He appreciated the warmth of the office.

"Not at all. Just making goody bags. Please make yourself comfortable." She offered motioning around the room to the couch or even the plush chairs flanking a dark table to the right. "Can I get you anything to eat or drink?" Jane was already headed to the cabinet hidden behind her wall drapes of shimmering blue. She moved it aside to reveal the replicator and above it a Freddy the frog poster thats message said in big bold letters under the dancing top hatted creature was to 'Experess your self.'

James went over and sat on the couch. "Maybe some water please. Thank you." He said looking at the poster. He smirked a little at the comment. "A dancing frog. Not what I was expecting in a Counselor's office. Although, I suppose it is supposed to be more inviting than my medical bay." The doctor said and leaned I to the couch.

The counselor collected two glasses of cool water and went to join the doctor on the couch. "You look tired doctor if you don't mind my saying. Have you been getting enough sleep?" She asked with genuine concern as she offered him the requested beverage.

He chuckled to himself. "It's been a while. Once the attack happened, most of my staff slept in my office. We rotated when we could but there was a long stream of injuries slowly making their way up." He said as his smile faded and face grew darker. "And when I do finally sleep, I'd rather be awake."

She saw his smile face and it made her heart hurt. She hadn't ment to make him uncomfortable or worse unhappy. She had read his file. Well the parts she had access to. So many people forget just how much doctors and nurses are exposed to in the way of teams. Or worse assume that these highly compassionate men and women are desensitized to it. "What can I do to help? Would you like to talk about it? If not I understand but I happen to know that sometimes being able to just talk about what has us worried or scared can help with gaining control over them." She says setting her drink onto the table. "I know that you don't really know me but please understand that nothing you say to me will ever leave my confidence."

"Well, its hard to know where to begin." The doctor thought for a moment. "Have you ever seen or been part of the aftermath of a mass casualty incident?"

Jane swallowed hard and nodded. "A shooting. At the clinic I did my training sit ins. A client somehow got access to a disruptor and locked a bunch of us inside. Then started just ... Well. Yes doctor I am familiar with that in a rather intimate way." She offered him a sad little smile.

The doctor nodded. "I'm sorry to hear that. Disruptors are not pleasant. I've been on all three sides, doctor fixing them, shooting someone with one and being hit by one." The doctor motioned to his shoulder and tapped it. "Mostly synthetic. Based on scarring you'd wonder how my arm was even still attatched."

"So what is it you would like to get from our time together?" She asked gently. Jane held back her tears. How awful. Simply awful. She knew that she could never really understand most of what this poor man had gone through. Still she was going to try. If he was willing to give her that chance that is. What she really wanted to ask was which incident was keeping him up at night. But he might not be ready to talk about it and she didn't want to push it so soon.

"Im not sure. To block out all these memories would be nice, but right now I'd settle for a good night sleep that is non-medicated." He said with a shake of his head. "The dreams last night became a blend of both scenarios. Normally it was just the first incident when I was still serving on the Bjorn, now it had Kazon."

It sounded like post tramatic stress. Not uncommon among those in the medical field. The current attack by the Kazon might have triggered something. "Do you feel up to maybe walking me through it? Talking about these events will help you regain control over them. Confronting the parallels can help us get to the root of what is causing them to reoccur. Your mind is trying to tell you something. It has connected the Kazon to this event for a reason. Your mind thinks it's important. Wants you to see something that your waking mind hasn't pieced together yet. Perhaps if you share it with me we can figure out what it is? You don't have to deal with this alone I'll be here every step of the way, but only if you feel comfortable with that. If not I do have some meditation technics and a few ideas on how to get some healthy non medicated sleep in the short term that may help as well."

"Id definitely like the sleep ideas. As far as the dreams, most of it is in the file. Responding to an explosion, lots of bodies everywhere, attacked by insurgents, etc. What was not in the reports was the patients I seen. A woman approached me holding what was a child. It was mangled and blackened. You would have a hard time recognizing but it was the woman's. She was begging for me to help, but there was nothing to do. I gave the child a black tag, an apology and moved on over the woman's crys." He sighed.

"Just a few moments later, the ambush happened. Dr. Jones, our Chief of Medicine was shot. I jumped over some rubble. I saw security and an insurgent wrestling on the ground, both killed each other. I crawled over to check on the security officer and an insurgent jumped over the barricade. I picked up the disruptor next to me and shot and killed him. I received a glancing shot in my shoulder a little while after I got Dr. Jones beamed back up." He shrugged. "Down and dirty, thats what happened."

"Yeah that certainly sounds like a nasty bit of hell. I am so sorry that you had to experience that. I know that I could read your file cover to cover and learn most of this. However it means nothing when compared to hearing it and seeing it through your eyes. Talking is painful yes. but as a doctor even you know that it sometimes has to hurt if it is to heal properly. Shooting a man even an enemy is difficult. I know as a fact that I could never do it. It might not be in my records but I know it to my eternal shame. Its something I live with like a ghost always asking 'What if?'. And of course the death of a child any child is hard to understand. I could also look through your records and try to point out all the good you have done and tell you how it outweighs that black tag you gave to that mother. But you know all of this already. Its not your head that holds onto it. Your a good man and that means it is likely something that is weighing more on your heart. Not the events them selves but what they represent which is unimaginable violence." Jane said softly. "So as for the sleep." She smiled softly. "Do you have a set schedule at all? I know as the ships doctor the term is sorta fast and loose but some of these methods work better if you have some time to commit to them. What sort of time do you have at the end of your day?"

James smirked. "Not over the last few weeks. Sleep has been mostly in my office. Once we reached Iota I finally slept in my bed. Of course that is when the dreams came back. The ship has a command program called the Chief, and he is able to run medical programming. We had intended for him to be able to cover and give us a break and help, but when the computer core got hit, it knocked something he needed offline. Hopefully I can keep my normal schedule now that we are closing in on normal operations."

"Yes I heard about that! I am actually looking forward to meeting him. He will be the first holographic identity that I will get to work with. I'm told that he is extremely self aware and something of a novelty. Oh! Yes sleep inducing ideas. I have a few that you can try out. First off try not to eat at least an hour before bed. If you can take a nice warm shower and then have a nice cup of tea or warm milk. Then there is touch therapy if you don't mind that sort of thing. There are holodeck programs or even I could assist you with that. It would be a couple nights a week of you, me and some essential oils and some spiffy pressure points and message. Feet are my specialty I'm told. Then we have aroma therapy soothing happy feel good smells that induce sweet dreams and things, or if you're not a fan of that we can try melatonin. It's not medication as it's naturally made in our bodies. It should not make you extra sleepy just help you but REM sleep a bit easier. I have other options too." Jane offered. This was a doctor his time was limited and she wanted him to have these tools to help him.

"How about yes to all of it?" The doctor said. I've dealt with it on and off for years but this time I think they want to stay. I haven't had a decent sleep since the attack, even at Iota, so I'll gladly try them all if they will help."

"Which would you prefer to try first? We can combined them make a little routine even." Jane suggested.

"How about some help with the aromatherapy? I can do the shower and tea, but not really sure what the aromatherapy could cover. I dont want to take to much of your time. I know a number of our crew need you as well." The doctor said with a smile.

He was very considerate. It made her smile brightly. "Lavender or even jasmine is always good. A couple drops of essential oils in a infuser next to the bed. Or incense if you prefer. Or if you have a significant other perhaps if you find their scent soothing you can put a shirt of their's over your pillow to snuggle up to. I like to put a couple drops of the lavender oil in to my shampoo. The steam and heat combined with the scent is very relaxing." Jane suggested.

The doctor smirked. "No, no significant other. The infuser sounds good. I'll replicate one and put in my bedroom and try the oils in the shower. Will probably help relax my shoulder anyway. The muscles seem to tense up more over the years." James smiled at the counselor. "Thank you Counselor. I appreciate you taking the time to listen. Its been a while since I talked about any of this."

"Just remember that my door is always open anytime. If this doesn't work we have other options." Jane said encouragingly. "I am actually interested in hearing more about you and just getting to be friends." She smiled. "On that note I believe that I can let you run free again. Please keep checking back with me to let me know your progress."

"Thank you Counselor, I will come back if things aren't helping and if they are, I will still come by and keep you updated." He stood up. "And you don't need to be a stranger in sickbay either. Baring another major incident, I usually can manage some extra time for a visit from people."

"I will certaintiy make time to do that. Ill even bring coffee." Jane promised as she too had gotten up to walk him to the exit.

"Sounds like a plan. I'll see you then." The doctor said and made his way out, ready to try some of those techniques this evening.


Lieutenant James Trallos MD
Chief Medical Officer

and

Ensign Jane Doe
Acting Chief Counselor